05/03/2008

'Sexless Marriage'

Much has been made up of sex and sexual relationship in marriage. Nevertheless there are instances when sex has been pushed to the background and in some cases people live in sexless relationships.

However, what is a ‘sexless marriage’?

A sexless marriage is defined by experts as making love ten times a year or less.

If these numbers fail to add up in your relationship, here is a quiz, developed by Drs. David Schnarch and Ruth Morehouse, which can help you assess the sexual side of your relationship.

In effect, when we talk about ‘sexless marriages’ we are not talking about abstinence. We are talking about lack of intensity or frequency in having sex.

There are couples who still love and are faithful to each other even in ‘sexless marriages’. One of the partners may have been sexually impaired either due to illness or as a result of an accident. In this instance we are not astonished by their unconditional love for each other.

Why is it we are skeptical when we learn about normal healthy couples who live in a sexless marriage or a relationship? Why do we ask, can these marriages survive or if it does, why do we wonder their affection is genuine or doubt their compatibility?